Tuesday, February 28, 2012

I make my daughter puke

Zoe has thrown up 3 times during her 9 month life. Every time, it has been completely my fault. Here's what I learned...

Lesson 1: Do not stick your finger in your baby's mouth while a plane is taking off

I read that it helps their ears if you let them suck during take-off and descent. Zoe wasn't interested in nursing and she doesn't take a pacifier. I thought it was a genius idea to have her suck on my finger in order to protect her little ears. Instead, I made her puke. Fortunately, it all landed in my lap. I deserved it.

Pre-puke: we were so happy

Lesson 2: Don't poison your baby with super smelly soap

I have to use a shield in order to feed Zoe. One time, I dropped it on the floor in a restaurant and when I went to wash it, the only soap they had was that crazy, super-smelly-paradise-tropics, bath and body works garbage (can you tell I don't like scents?).

Well, it made her puke.

Lesson 3: Don't feed your child spoiled food

Seems like a no brainer right? Apparently not. I don't eat dairy, but I do feed my child dairy. I usually taste her food before feeding it to her. Not so much with the cheese and yogurt, so I go by look and smell. I fed Zoe a few pieces of gouda with dinner, which she happily ate. I thought there was a piece of corn left in her bowl and I picked it up and ate it. It was cheese.

It tasted like blue cheese. Which is great when you are eating blue cheese. Except it was gouda remember?  Awesome sauce - I just fed her rotten food and didn't even know it.

She puked 5 minutes later.



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